What was on TV? Tues, Nov. 16, 2004

US forces were committing war crimes in Iraq. 800,000 Bowflex machines were recalled by the US government. Let's see what was on TV.

8:00 Everwood (recorded)

3x05 "Sacrifice"

Now that Everwood's OTP is happily coupled up, Everwood can be all about the friendships. I love it. Watching Hannah and Amy grow closer, each cautious and eager in their own way, has been a highlight of the season so far. And watching Ephram and Bright's relationship fall apart was subtle, perfect, and heartbreaking.

I also loved the Dr. Abbot c-story this week, in which he becomes determined to invent something, anything, to compete with Dr. Brown. The flavored sticks! It was everything. Someone please write a fanfic in which he goes on Shark Tank.

This episode was written by Anna Fricke. Fricke got her start on Dawson's Creek. She later developed the US version of Being Human and the Walker, Texas Ranger reboot.

This episode was directed by Michael Schultz. Schultz is a pioneering mixed-race director who has been directing TV since the '70s. He has also worked extensively in theater and film, collaborating with Lorraine Hansberry, Richard Pryor, and Denzel Washington. His television credits include Picket Fences and several other David E. Kelly shows, Everwood and several other Greg Berlanti shows, and All American and several other recent Black comedies and dramas.

9:00 House on Fox

1x01 "Pilot" (record Scrubs on NBC and Frontline on PBS)

I could talk about Hugh Laurie's performance or the show's portrayal of addiction or the bizarre racial and gender politics. But I'm going to save that for future episodes.

Watching this episode, all I could think was "this looks like shit!" The pilot was directed by known predator and general creep and asshole Bryan Singer. Today, this is a black mark. But back in 2004, Singer was a critically acclaimed hitmaker and a real get for the show. His reputation made people take the show seriously, and his name was dropped in every review.

It must have been his reputation that made people take the show seriously. Because it certainly wasn't his work. The show looks like ass. It has this weird gauzy look that reminds me of the '80s, but it also looks like an ugly early 2000s digital film. It's like the worst of both worlds. The framing and editing also just lacks purpose, tension, and clarity. There are all these gross out sequences that feel like a naked attempt to copy CSI, and journeys inside the body full of ugly and unconvincing CGI renderings. It's bad.

It's a testament to Hugh Laurie and the writing (but mostly to Hugh Laurie) that House emerges as a compelling character through all this. He's tortured, annoying, and charming, but he doesn't feel like a cliche. His one scene where he actually talks to the patient (Robin Tunney, quite good) is a real standout, and makes me want to watch another episode all by itself.

This episode was written by series creator David Shore and directed by Bryan Singer (I talked about him. He sucks).

10:00 Scrubs (recorded)

4x10 "My Female Trouble"

This episode continues the malpractice suit storyline. Watching Alicia Florrick date Zach Braff (complete with kinky sex stuff!) continues to be incredibly unsettling. But I got to watch Richard Kind play tennis! That was fun. Next episode stars Matthew Perry (they really went all-in on the sweeps guest stars this year). So I'm curious about that.

This episode was written by Debra Fordham. Scrubs was her first tv writing job. She has since worked on Army Wives, Hart of Dixie, Nashville, and Virgin River.

This episode was directed by Chris Koch. His directing credits include episodes of The Adventures of Pete & Pete, Modern Family, Galavant, This is Us, and Only Murders in the Building.

10:30 Laguna Beach on MTV

1x08 "Grin and Bear It"

Last episode was all about yearning and nostalgia and rights of passage. This episode is just silly. As a city girl who's been on some "gnarly" hikes (to use Kristen's verbiage), there are few things on this earth that bring more joy than watching people fail at the outdoors. The show wants to show us how shallow they are since they can't kayak or set up a tent or even sit in a chair away from their precious suburban paradise. The spectacle gives me permission to be shallow and laugh at them. We're all shallow together. It's wonderful.

Other highlights of the episode include Christina not getting a solo at the church concert, Stephen's bear costume, night vision, and Kristin uttering the words "Mother Theresa and other gnarly people."

Late Night

On Late Night, Jerry Butters the terrible early morning talk show host returns. There's a joke about how terrible and tired jokes about Star Jones' wedding are. I agree! I have listened to so, so many terrible jokes about Star Jones and her wedding. A fat Black woman getting married, imagine! That is the punchline of every joke. It's gratifying to know that some people out there hated them as much as I do. This leads me to ask Conan and the writing staff: why did you keep telling them? Every night, we have to do the Star Jones joke. What if you just stopped? Imagine!

What Else Was On

UPN aired the second-ever Vibe Awards. Produced by Vibe Magazine, the awards were intended to honor the best in hip-hop, R&B, and Black music generally. The 2004 ceremony was hosted by Tyra Banks and LL Cool J and held in a Santa Monica airport hanger. Snoop Dogg and Qunicy Jones were in attendance, and they took the stage partway through the show to present Dr. Dre with a lifetime achievement.

What happened next is what the Vibe Awards are best remembered for. As Dr. Dre was walking up to the stage, a local man came up and asked for an autograph, and then assaulted Dre. Rapper Young Buck took it upon himself to defend Dre and stabbed the guy, and a larger fight erupted. If you're curious, a dude in the crowd filmed the whole thing and the video made it to YouTube, he gets pretty close to some big names too!

As you can imagine, some ugly and racist jokes followed on Late Night shows (and I'm sure in lots of other places). The Vibe Awards continued for one more year on UPN, before the channel merged with the WB in 2006. The Vibe Awards had no place on the much Whiter CW, so Vh1 aired them for another year before they were discontinued. Besides videos related to the fight, only a handful of performances from the event survive online, and none from this year. It's a bummer. It would have been cool for the BET Awards to have a competitor, the Golden Globes to its Oscars.

Special Sweeps Guest Star

George Wendt on George Lopez.

TiVo Status

3 episodes of Everwood, the three hour Masterpiece Theater miniseries The Lost Prince, and The Office Christmas Special from across the pond (I’ll watch that one closer to the holidays, after I’ve rewatched the series), the two hour first part of Henry VIII, and first part of Category 6: Day of Destruction (2 hours), one episode of Frontline (1 hour). 13 hours, 15 hours of space left.